One Feedback Does Not Fit All: How to Give Feedback by Nature, Not by Habit
Picture a Monday meeting. A business owner tells two team members the same thing: "This report was not good enough. Redo it."
The first person says, "Got it!" and comes back with a better report by lunch.
The second person goes quiet. For the rest of the week, they do the work, but the spark is gone.
Same words. Same boss. Two very different results.
Most of us give feedback the way we like to receive it. That is a habit. But the people in front of us are not copies of us. Each one has a nature.
Darr nahi, samajh. Let's understand it.
First, the SALSA® basics in one minute
The SALSA® Method of Astrology keeps it very simple:
- Houses are situations. Home, work, money, partners, children, learning.
- Planets are behaviours and actions. How we act in those situations.
- Signs (rashis) are expectations. What a situation expects from us.
- Transits are modifications. A moving planet changes a situation for a while.
Feedback is a situation at work. How a person reacts to it is behaviour. And what they quietly hope for from you is expectation. Once you see these three, feedback becomes much easier.
Why the same words land differently
Every person carries a different expectation into a feedback talk. A few common ones:
- "Tell me straight." Some people want it short and direct. A long, soft talk feels like a waste of time to them.
- "Respect me first." Some people need to hear what they did well before they can hear what to fix. Without that, they feel insulted, not guided.
- "Explain the why." Some people need the reason. "Redo it" means nothing to them. "Redo it because the client needs numbers on page one" makes total sense.
- "Give me time." Some people need a day to think. If you ask for an answer in the same meeting, they freeze.
None of these is good or bad. They are just different natures. The mistake is using one style for everyone.
A simple 4-step feedback framework
Here is a practical way any business owner or manager can use this week:
- Know the person's expectation. Before you speak, ask yourself: does this person want it straight, want respect first, want the why, or want time?
- Name the situation, not the person. Say "This report missed the client's numbers," not "You are careless." Talk about the situation, not their character.
- Suggest one behaviour. Give one clear action to change. Not five. One.
- Check how it landed. End with a simple question: "Does this make sense? What do you need from me?"
Write these four points on a small card and keep it on your desk. Use it before every feedback talk for one month.
A note for hiring, too
In our earlier post, we said: hire the nature, not just the resume. Feedback is the next step. Once you have hired someone for their nature, you also have to guide them according to their nature.
A person who loves a challenge will grow with tough, direct feedback. A person who builds things slowly and carefully will grow with patient, step-by-step guidance. When the feedback fits the nature, people stay longer and do better work.
What about you?
This works the other way too. When your boss, client or partner gives you feedback, notice your own reaction.
- Do you get angry when it is too direct?
- Do you feel hurt when nobody says what you did well?
- Do you need the reason before you can accept it?
Your reaction is not a weakness. It is your nature showing. Once you know it, you can simply tell people, "I work best when you explain the why." That one line can save months of misunderstanding.
Darr nahi, samajh
A difficult feedback talk is not a fight. It is a chance for two natures to understand each other.
Know the situation. Know what the person expects. Choose the right behaviour. That is the SALSA® Method of Astrology, at work.
Start with your own nature
Before you understand your team, it helps to understand yourself first.
The SALSA® Swabhav Sadhak Course helps you understand your own behaviours through the SALSA® Method of Astrology, in very easy words. It costs just ₹9.
Begin your SALSA® Learning Journey today with the ₹9 SALSA® Swabhav Sadhak Course on the AUM Gurukul website.
With love, Dr. Sudhir & Dr. Vidhya Dr. Sudhir Khollam and Dr. Vidhya Khollam (Dr. SuVi), creators of the SALSA® Method of Astrology, AUM Gurukul
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